Question 1

How brutal is the startup roasting?

Accepted Answer

Think Shark Tank meets Simon Cowell, but with AI precision. We'll tear apart your pitch deck, business model, and market assumptions with surgical accuracy. But don't worry, we also tell you exactly how to fix everything (assuming it's fixable).

Question 2

How long does the analysis take?

Accepted Answer

24-48 hours for a comprehensive roast. We need time to properly crush your dreams and rebuild them into something investors might actually fund. Need it faster? Our 'Emergency Pivot' package delivers in 12 hours.

Question 3

Is my startup data secure?

Accepted Answer

More secure than your current runway. We use enterprise-grade encryption and sign NDAs. Your questionable market size calculations are safe with us.

Question 4

How does the AI analysis work?

Accepted Answer

Our AI combines insights from VCs, founders, and market analysts to evaluate your startup across 50+ metrics. It's like having a board of advisors who aren't afraid to hurt your feelings.

Question 5

What's included in the roast report?

Accepted Answer

A detailed teardown of your business model, market analysis, competitive landscape, financial projections, and team composition. Plus, actionable recommendations and a reality check score.

Question 6

Do you offer refunds?

Accepted Answer

Yes, if we fail to find any problems with your startup (hasn't happened yet). No refunds for hurt feelings or shattered dreams - those are part of the service.

Question 7

Can you help with fundraising?

Accepted Answer

We don't directly help with fundraising, but our roasts have helped startups increase their funding success rate by 3.5x. Turns out investors like startups that have addressed their obvious flaws.

Question 8

What if I disagree with the roast?

Accepted Answer

That's fine, but remember: the market will be even harsher. We're just the messenger trying to save you time, money, and embarrassment. Plus, our AI doesn't have an ego to bruise.